Confession

It was yet another boring day in the campus.i was back in the hostel as there were no classes in the afternoon session.my frustrations always increased inside the four dull walls of our hostel room.time passed by, we guys went to have evening coffee from the mess hall.me and my close friend ,ajay,who is my 'comrade' for all the mischevious activities,went to the side of our hostel where the outside village of amrita campus is visible.while i sip down the coffe i looked at the non-amrita world through the grills.a student in amrita can got out only once in a month from the campus,that too clearing hectic formalities.while i was looking outside thrugh the steel grills,the free bird inside me was urging to flee out from our lifeless campus.without asking too much questions to myself,i asked ajay "i'm fed up sitting inside this hell,can we jump out and free ourselves??"
after a long stare through the grills,he gave me a positive wink,and that was the thumps up for the operation.
we observed the paddy fields outside the grill and watched the way farmers are moving ,to make out our path clear in minds.
the plan was fixed at 7'oclock at night,beause its the time when wardens and attenders go to mess hall.while we were gearing up for the operation so many thoughts passed through my mind.for students in ther colleges,jumping out of hostels may be walk in the park,but for an amritian its like prison break.if caught,a minimum of two week suspension is guarenteed with a good amount of fine.the other thing that came to my mind was that ,there is nothing we can do if we jump outside,as the campus is situated in a village area.there are only paddy fields and a small railway station.the only hang out near by is a 'dhaba' where we get non veg dishes and cigarettes which are taboos in amrita.so dhaba was the aim.
both of us got ready,some of our roommates warned us not to go.as it was our final decision they couldn't argue much and gave money to buy food and cigarettes from dhaba.
we folded our pants upto thigh height and wore dhotis to get a look of farmers.at around 7'o clock,we went near the grill and made sure no one is watching,then both of us climbed up and got out of the campus.just outside the giant grill,there is a hut of a farmer.so we have to move very carefully. there were no lights around,all we could see is the light from the hut.we slowly walked through the fields,we passed by wild bushes and trees in the darkness.that time,the only fear in our minds was snakes and scorpions which can show us the way to hell with one bite.the way was long,unlike we thought as the fields were large in area.as we moved on we heard the stray dogs barking and howling.the barks of dogs became closer.we threw some stones in the direction of the barks.nothing bad happened as we moved further to find the ettimadai railway station.we removed our dhotis and unfolded our pants before we crossed the railway station.after that the road was smooth with street lights on.but every time a vehicle passed by,we hid our selves in the road side bush fearing that it may be some one from the campus.after a five minute walk we reached dhaba and ordered eggrolls for roommates and for ourselves.the reason to buy egg rolls is that it is cheap and is a stomach filler.both of us lit a cigarette and enjoyed the freedom from our "prison" college.altough we smoke frequently inside hostel bathrooms,a smoke from outside is a huge relief as there is no need to be afraid of crooked wardens.we packed the egg rolls and started walking back to the college.we crossed the railway station and found the place were we left our dhotis.we wore it again and started walking back through the paddy fields.but this time the barks of dogs were louder and clearer.as we both reached the middle of a field the barks was so clear and we could see the sparkling eyes of stray dogs.this time we lost every grain of our guts and started to threw evrything that came in our hands.this worked and the dogs with drew to the darkness,but there were barks and howls all over the place.after crossing three big fields we reached near the back of our hostel.we could then see the lights in our hostel rooms .may be becuase of the noise made by the dogs, a man came out from the hut and switched on the flash light on us.
in a split second ajay seized my neck and made me lay on the bare ground.at that point we were virtually laying on that paddy field. i could smell the moist soil as we saw the flash light searching on the bushes near to us.we could hear our heart beats during those seconds.after few minutes lights went off and we called our roommates through mobile phones and made sure no one is near the grills.after we got the green signal from our friends we climbed back and got inside the campus.
every one was curious to hear about our venture. we shared the eggrolls and didn't really mind the small bruises caused by spines of bushes.the eggrolls were tastier that day,dont know why.
the very next morning ,while we were on the way to college we glanced throught the giant grills and looked each other with smile in our face.
the reason why i gave the title as 'confession' is becuse,as we were journalism sudents we were supposed to write a campus story.our ma'am will decide the topics we select.me and ajay was in one group,and we slected a topic on the students jumping out from the college illegally,like we did.our ma'am was afraid to proceed with that topic, so she said a big 'NO'.but i insisted a lot to take that topic,after all we are doing it,not her.she challenged us that if we have the spine to write down a confession letter about our jump out with signature,she could allow us to take up that story.think she doubted our genre ,any how i wrote the whole operation in black and white with siganture and gave it to her.but she still couldn't allow us to take up that story.....cowards die many time,but a valiant only once.

Spirituality,a business

Our country , india is intertwined with many religions,even more number of castes and sub castes which no other country may have.People in our country have a strong bond with their respective religions and they cant imagine lifes without gods,temples,prayers and traditions.iIthink its becuase of this attitude of people that rationalist parties like CPI,CPI(M )is confined to three states of twenty eight sates in the country.Only contries like pakistan,sri langa,nepal,bangladesh which constitute indian sub continent is having this strong religious sentimence,the reason for this is still not sure.




As a result of this intense religious mood prevailing in the country a more holier version called spirituality started to germinate.In this new edition its a person who self proclaims that he is the avatar of god or he'll show you the way to god.Most of these spiritual leaders or the "god-man" are propogaters of hindu religion than other religion becuase of this religion's majority in the country and its mythologocal background.One can notice that the recognition and growth of these "spiritual leaders" are phenomenal.As soon as they get well establisehd and the people got trust in them they slowly launch their business programes like muti speciality hospitals,schools,colleges in the name the these "spiritual saints" .If we look into these institutions one will go awestruck on seeing its plush infrastructure and faclities.People leave lavish praise on these organisations without thinking about the financial source of these institutionsand most of these institutions claim that they are getting financial backup from foreign institutions and foreigners also donations from native followers.In the educational institutionals they have a hidden agenda of promoting the views of the owners or our "spiritual leaders".


HOW PEOPLE GET ATTRACTED TO THESE FAKE SAINTS?


Its an universal truth that everybody in this earth is having some or the other problem.In this new and fast moving world people are having stress,tension,family problems and all kinds of difficulties.All these kind of problems accumulate togather and onje gets mentally weaker as tie progresses.The only way to relese all this stress is liberate youself or free yourself. The best way to do this is by telling your problems to someone and scream or cry or watever way one like to express.A person with more will power can sit alone and think where he went wrong and how to tackle his flaws.But in the present


quick paced world one really dont have the time or mentality or the environment to do this in practical.So people for a last resort come to visit these "god's men" and here they are recieved with a very holy ambience like someone in saffron outfit is singing songs or "bhajans" or watever they call't and lights and loads more.So most of the people will be mentaly relaxed by this atmosphere and in the second step they'll unveil all their diifficulties and problems to "god's men" gifting them with fruits and all ,like that offerings made in temples.After disclosing all their difficultie and bursting out with emotions one will feel they had attained ultimate salvation ,thats nirvana.But none of them is realising this freedom of mind can be acheived in a very lonely place hugging your pillow and unwrapping all difficulties and pronblems or telling all this to your most dearest person in life.Instead you go and offer friuts and all listen to those "bhajans" and unveil your mind whose completly unknown to you.Feel pitty on youself dear friends....


Be strong in heart and solve problems by yourself istead falling prey to those fake "saints"

Doomed day

"Get up you lousy drunkard"that voice disturbed my sleep,a very peaceful nap.when i opened my eyes i saw the most hated figure in the hostel in front of me,warden. there was no other second for restoring my mind,i was pulled up and dragged outside my room.still in sub consciousness i was clueless of what was happening.i saw my friends around with worried faces.sleep,left over dreams,hang over.....all this took me another minute to fix the situation..."yes i was caught for boozing in hostel".that was the charge.i was taken to wardens room,he was shouting at me ,but for me it was a backgroung sound becuase by now the scene was clear for me,my name was reported by my classmate.wardens was geeting testimony from him,i watched that helpless.'yes sir he boozed overnight and abused me" said that guy without daring to look at my eyes.time is 1 45 am.Six of us drunk last night around 11 as a part of the farewell of ur dearest guest faculty,he was leaving the campus for new job.sir brought us two half bottles of vodka to the hostel,just becuase we forced him.six of us finished the bottle and surprisingly we gave one peg to the most decent guy in our class,gentle man and all according to others!!,becuas he promised long before that he will drink with us for once.so we gave a peg and he finished it in a second.night got more fuzzier .we danced with music on,and went to give the birthday bums to one of our engineering friends.everything was kick ass fun....after all that i did the mistake of my lifetime,can't call it a mistake,it was the outrage of the clotted frustration......i went and called up rakesh who was sleeping"what the fuck you wanna do to me eh??u wanna do something do it now asshole"....after shouting at him i went to sleep with serene content.i was having having dislike towards him  from second year,before that we were best buddies in the department,although we believed in diffrent ideologies.many a times i made heard his words and jumped into troubles,but i never hated him,but he was over influenced by one of our faculty members and slowly got seperated from us.but i never talked to him after that and never did any harm to him by anymeans but always had frustration towards him as he was becoming a slave of that faculty member , that night with venom in i lost my control and yelled at him.
Now i am here ,warden's room confessing with much pressure and torturing.all five of us were taken to main gate to confirm our mistake with alcohol detector.65,60,55,50,50...read the detector.....all nails screwed.then we were taken back.by that time rakesh also said that it is our sir who brought the bottles.we were again brought back to warden's room....we guys were getting all tired and weak as the time went on.then started the raid.wardens checked  outside our rooms and to worker's area,they got one full sack of liquor bottles which they said was ours.we pleaded like any thing "sir believe us its not ours,for mother sake believe us".every one reached their breaking point.we were framed ,closing all doors.i saw smiles and dry jokes from wardens.they got their meal.we were tired to that extent were we where not able to plead.At around 6 30 we were abandoned by wardens.after confessing,begging,torturing,cruel jokes we hit our beds.

at 10 30 we woke up,while i was in toilet warden came to and asked all of us to get ready,soon,with no space given to bath we were packed,i was not even allowed to brush.i swallowed some tooth paste to convince habits. we were taken to deans office .we were awarded a sem out....."go have some chilled beer in your house and enjoy the holidays" was the response of dean when we begged.i stopped beeging.i knew it was final.memo was drafted.we were instructed to vacate the hostel rooms .....with no time to spare we were kicked out of the campus.
with bags full of luggage's.all five and our sir at in the dhaba ....after long time silence we started to lift ourselves up...to change the mood...we started cracking jokes......we smiled after hours...as time passed,each one of them left to their homes,for the first time in two years every one left home with shame and agony.our sir and vishnu left to Bangalore....me and siva stayed in the daba.....thanks to the poor workers of dhaba who spared there food and gave us space t sleep that night.
with minds getting black out and life asking "how to move on?" we slept in the dhaba floor without dreams or aspiration to hope.

edited facts and jokes:
1 .)sixth guy who boozed with us and the seventh,the gentleman who took one short was not dragged into the issue.we never wanted also
2.)when we were infront of deans office waiting for the call.hari(co culprit) said:"dude we are gonna get famous and we'll get girls and fans....thats the history of suspension in this college"
3.)just after we were kicked out of campus,sir asked us:"shall we go and have a chilled beer guys?"
4.)before all this happened we guys made a farewell presentation for our sir to screen in class,fate,we five and sir sat in dhaba and saw the presentation in our laps.
5.)we consoled each other saying "suspension alle,petrol pump onnumalallo?"